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Anthony Bourdain

I liked his book. Passionately hated his CNN show - like so much I wanted to throw bricks at the TV when it was on.

Agree that suicide, regardless of the reasons, is incredibly selfish (of course, serious mental illness tends to be selfish anyway). Experienced so much suicide in my lifetime that I have zero respect or empathy for those who do it given the impact on the survivors and loved ones, including my eldest brother, best friend in high school, two other good friends in high school, classmate in college, hated classmate in high school, estranged relative, and two co-workers in the music business who I had critical dealings with and whom I was counting on to do what they committed to do. Suicide is awful for those who are left behind, and taking one's own life in an obvious suicide (unlike a questionable situation like driving a car into an oncoming 18-wheeler), is nothing but total disregard for those who loved you - even if they could not remedy your suffering. I know mental illness can be hard, but that doesn't make causing lifelong pain for those who love you justified.
 
Such a sad situation. Everyone loses. I hope his daughter has a large group of people to support her emotionally. She won't understand.

I really like his travel food shows. His writing and commentary were incredible.
 
Flint said:
I liked his book. Passionately hated his CNN show - like so much I wanted to throw bricks at the TV when it was on.

Agree that suicide, regardless of the reasons, is incredibly selfish (of course, serious mental illness tends to be selfish anyway). Experienced so much suicide in my lifetime that I have zero respect or empathy for those who do it given the impact on the survivors and loved ones, including my eldest brother, best friend in high school, two other good friends in high school, classmate in college, hated classmate in high school, estranged relative, and two co-workers in the music business who I had critical dealings with and whom I was counting on to do what they committed to do. Suicide is awful for those who are left behind, and taking one's own life in an obvious suicide (unlike a questionable situation like driving a car into an oncoming 18-wheeler), is nothing but total disregard for those who loved you - even if they could not remedy your suffering. I know mental illness can be hard, but that doesn't make causing lifelong pain for those who love you justified.
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First let me say I am truly sorry for the pain and loss suicide has caused you over the years.

That being said do you feel this type of anger towards those you may have lost to cancer, heart disease or other types of physical illnesses that lead to death? I know nothing of the circumstances regarding those you have lost but it seems as if you think they all made a well reasoned conscious decision to commit suicide. Those that have depression or other serious mental health conditions most often are not thinking reasonably. I would think that most people suffering serious depression or from other mental illness are not making a well thought out decision that includes causing life long pain to loved ones or having total disregard for loved ones. In fact in most instances they think the exact opposite, that their death will free their loved ones from having to deal with them and their illness. In most instances that is not the case. Mental illness is just as much a negative health condition as cancer, heart disease or other "physical" illnesses.

Your post makes it sound as if you think those that commit suicide are making a well thought out conscious decision to end their lives. It also sounds as if you are more concerned about how their actions effected you personally than the pain and suffering they were going thru that led to taking their own lives. I know enough about you to think this is really not how you feel but for me that is how your comes across.

We need to look at mental illness in the same way we look at "physical" illness and afford those suffering the same empathy and assistance including comprehensive health health care.
 
I was making no statement about the importance of getting help for those suffering serious mental illness. I also do not harbor hate as accused. There is a difference between hate and refusing to look at suicide with empathy. Life is more complicated than simple "acceptance & support" versus "absolute hatred", as it seems every conversation on important issues seems to become of late.
 
Why are people upset that somebody said they are angry with the person who committed suicide? On one hand you say the person can't help the way they are feeling, but on the other hand chastise people for feeling what they feel when someone close to them commits suicide, when they can't help the way they feel any more than the person that committed suicide. That's not saying you hate that person, but you hate what happened, you hate that you couldn't have done more to prevent it, and you hate what it does to those around you.

I would agree completely that more needs to be done with mental health, but I also think we need to take a different approach to it. We have become a very heavily medicated society, and I wonder how many of those that commit suicide where also on anti-depressants? One of the main side effects is suicidal thoughts, and I think it's a pretty common side effect.
 
Flint said:
I was making no statement about the importance of getting help for those suffering serious mental illness. I also do not harbor hate as accused. There is a difference between hate and refusing to look at suicide with empathy. Life is more complicated than simple "acceptance & support" versus "absolute hatred", as it seems every conversation on important issues seems to become of late.
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I have reread my post several times and nowhere do I see where I accused you of "harboring hate" or even using the word hate much less "absolute hatred".

Those are your words not mine and do not reflect my post. I resent the insulation that I 'accused" you of such.
 
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Huey said:
Why are people upset that somebody said they are angry with the person who committed suicide? On one hand you say the person can't help the way they are feeling, but on the other hand chastise people for feeling what they feel when someone close to them commits suicide, when they can't help the way they feel any more than the person that committed suicide. That's not saying you hate that person, but you hate what happened, you hate that you couldn't have done more to prevent it, and you hate what it does to those around you.

I would agree completely that more needs to be done with mental health, but I also think we need to take a different approach to it. We have become a very heavily medicated society, and I wonder how many of those that commit suicide where also on anti-depressants? One of the main side effects is suicidal thoughts, and I think it's a pretty common side effect.
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I would posit that the person who suffers from mental illness many times cannot control or help the way they feel or behave whereas those who do not suffer from mental illness can control the way the feel.

Also I can understand an initial felling of anger and disappointment when someone close takes their own life but I would hope that with time and reflection the pain and illness the deceased person was going thru would allow that anger to be replaced with empathy and an effort to understand why they did what they did.
 
I think we’re having a heated agreement. We’re just framing our statements from different perspectives. Some of us are putting ourselves in the shoes of the person who committed suicide and other are coming from the perspective of those left behind. But at the end of the day we feel for both parties.
 
I truly enjoyed Anthony Bourdain. He had such a passion for food, the culture of food and the preparation of food. I found him charming & charismatic, with a like me or not attitude.

A Christmas gift from Zing, many years ago, was a book titled “My Last Supper”.
50 Great Chefs and Their Final Meals. Written by Melanie Dunea, Introduction by Anthony Bourdain. An incredible part of my kitchen library, also a favorite!

Anthony’s take on his “Last Supper”.


by Barbi Zingone, on Flickr

And his picture, not many can pull this off...


by Barbi Zingone, on Flickr

Whatever his reason was, I can only say, it makes me sad that his choosing to end his life has a profound effect on so many. May he Rest In Peace!
 
Netflix Canada has just posted eight seasons of Parts Unknown.

If happiness and sadness can ever co-exist, this is it!
 
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