… you call yourself an audio nerd, join a forum of folk specifically to discuss audio, and then tell us your wife calls all the shots? You're like the guy who joins the Corvette club but drives a Miata.
But seriously.... Your drop ceiling is already a bass trap. You can vastly enhance its performance by rolling out layers of fiberglass batting above the tiles and replacing all of the ones along the edges of the ceiling with different tiles which are not solid. That would be an amazing bass trap.
Then make a real effort on speaker placement and listening positioning. Get away from the walls and ensure everything is symmetrical between left and right.
The rest, like absorption panels for early reflections and diffusors for slap echo are icing on top of that cake.
But seriously.... Your drop ceiling is already a bass trap. You can vastly enhance its performance by rolling out layers of fiberglass batting above the tiles and replacing all of the ones along the edges of the ceiling with different tiles which are not solid. That would be an amazing bass trap.
Then make a real effort on speaker placement and listening positioning. Get away from the walls and ensure everything is symmetrical between left and right.
The rest, like absorption panels for early reflections and diffusors for slap echo are icing on top of that cake.