Behind the Curtain
This was a post I made in another thread, but I wanted to separate it out into its own thread. I've listened to this song several more times, and the intensity of the emotional reaction it brings up in me has only grown. This is weird to me, and it fascinates me, and I don't understand it. I'm not normally a particularly emotional person. But this song touches something way, way down, and as I listened again today, I tried to grasp why it yanks at me as much as it does, but failed - I just don't know. The closest thing I can think of to explain the experience is like (from what I imagine) you're with a psychiatrist and he/she is bringing up your inmost persona - not the greatest pain or the greatest joy, but somehow all of it together.PaulyT said:And the song "Mother Marian" - WOW! I haven't been hit that hard emotionally by a song for quite some time. Not sure what it is about it exactly, not just the lyrics, not just the music, but somehow both and Rory's performance of it, just nails me.
I listened to the song this morning in the car on the way to my yoga class, and had to sit in the car for a few minutes before going inside, in order to compose myself. And I listened to it a bit ago here at home, in an empty house so I could "let it all come out" without embarrassing myself - because I admit, with some hesitation, that I cried my eyes out. Not just a tear or two but all out sobbing, like I haven't experienced since my mom died ~8 years ago. And no there's no direct connection between this song and my mom or anything else in my life. The only thing I can come up with is that it's somehow - to me - a perfect combination of music, performance - just Rory and her guitar, nothing unusually fancy, but beautifully sung; and lyrics telling a story of deep sadness and deep beauty at the same time. And "beauty" is not even the right word here, more like a feeling of rightness, awe even, sort of a "that's how it should be" thing despite the sadness. Again I'm struggling for words here, it's inadequate. A "perfect storm" of a song as it relates to me.
I'm sure if any of you heard the song, you'd be left wondering what the big deal was. This is very, very personal, and I've NEVER before experienced anything as powerful as this in reaction to music. I'm writing this really more to try to understand it myself, introspective nerd that I am, than in expectation that any of you will get the same reaction from the song.
(Though the whole album is good, I certainly recommend it. I'm becoming a big fan of hers.)
Anyway, there it is, all out there for you to see. Yeah, PaulyT cried like a little girl. :crying-yellow:
I've got Rory's autobiography, I'm curious to see if this is based on her own life and relationship with a person as described in this song.
And yeah, I'm deliberately leaving out detail on the story of the song itself. Go listen to it.